Thursday, October 05, 2006
been sick for the pass few days ..have not seen the doc, seem to be recovering very slowly..however i still feel very lethagic, diarrhea still here ..no appetite for my meals, therefore causing gastric and most likely the diarrhea ..headache also still present but slightly better ..body aches are gone, lasted like a day or 2 ..met her earlier on, chit chat for like 2 or 3 hours ..came home took a nap and when i woke up,the feelings came ..it all came so fast, in a split sec ..started with a feeling of emptiness, a void in me ..than the negative thoughts poured in almost immediately ..anger, hatred, betrayal, sadness, confussion, disappointment, hopelessness ..felt like grabbing the photo frame by my bed and just throwit against the wall, felt as though my world would not last any longer ..that moment of despair though, was brief ..no matter what i knew i had to block those thoughts out ..they serve no purpose other than to destroy one's soul,one's love for another ..took a shower, quickly went online and started chatting with some friends so that i could let my mind concentrate on something else ..gonna have a session with my personal mentor tomorrow ..gonna talk about some stuff, hope it turns out fruitful ..gonna meet jocelyn as well, heading to the CC get some stuff donebefore i head to my PM's place ..dunno if i can last though, felt so weak today ..sorry i lost my temper at u, just wasn't in a very good mood for some reasons, plus i wasn't feeling very well ..hope u understand ..
her terrible boy horribly blogged @ 23:08
