Saturday, May 26, 2007
wanted to blog this yesterday but i forgot about it so here it is haha.ok, i shall never auto roam again. or rather, try my best not to auto roam.you know, check other girls out and stuff.cause i realised how much i hated it when other guys kept checking her out.yeah, so must kinda spare a thought for my other bros out there haha.thats the main thing though, i really cant stand it. dunno if its jealousy or what. it cant be jealousy because i am with her.i dunno, i just feel, what the hell, feel kinda disgusted. and they are worst than me God damn it, they turn their entire bodies,even their toes point in the opposite direction after a while. cant stand it really. sick idiots. well at least i have her heart, your dont HAHA :Pok that was really childish, just something to comfort myself with ahhaha.oh man, i really dunno la. the whole day. really couldn't stand it.nah, she's not the cause of it. i mean, girls like to doll up, dress up and stuff.its the guy's fault most of the time. we just cant help but look,ogle at the ladies we think beautiful.its not all girls that dress for the attention you know.ah, appreciating a lady, thats one tough chapter, besides understanding one.tough chapters eh. not good at studying as well hahah sucks.ok, shall slowly learn again. every girl is unique in her own way.yup, learn about her, her likes and dislikes. learnt a few already.quite a bit of everything, so yeah, must jia you. i seriously dunch know why i am going though i didn't intend to.alright, heike sent me some pretty nice songs, they are classified as "indie"like those songs in those american shows. where the actors are driving on the desert highway with their windows down,and in the back ground there are those real relaxing music. dun think horror shows, think those kind like the lake house, yup.well some are meaningful some are just nice to listen to. ok, we have one kind in common hhaha, we like some of the oldies.its also the same reason that got us started, our fathers listened to them when we were young hahaha.so was like oh wow really ahhaha. really amusing i must say ahaha.how does one express their feelings for another, they dun wanna use "love you"because the feelings are not that strong. and its kinda weird to use "like you".so whats the word that would describe the feel ahha. since its neither like nor love but in between, the intensity of the feelings.hmmm, " dun love you but i like you ? " hahahahah. sounds weird haha.or maybe this " i love you " hahaha, also weird. and if the girl askes huh? just reply, sry typed wrongly hahaha. ouch.ok, anyway thats just a no brain thought that came to my mind.ok i got it sorted out yup. now its just when to get what. coming up with a bunch of reasons on which to get first.the liquor should come second, over the jacket.its just a want, the liquor, so yeah, thats the hard part. neccessity vs desire.and the other part would be the timing. cant get it too soon or too late, depending on which item.cause it would either mean i would be too broke to survive the month, or i wouldn't have any money left to get it.i just remembered though, that i would only have to survive for about 3 weeks cause i'll be away for one.so yeah, that lessens the pressure on my funds. plus i would be able to get back some money from some friends.and some extra funding from elsewhere when the day comes.yesh these just came to my mind. must becareful with all the cash though.dun just burn it all away hahaha.that extra input would further last me another 3 weeks easily. if i dun go pubbing and stuff. which now, with her, i most likely won't.and yeah, maybe spend the last day with her before flying off.oh yeah, i had a super horrible dream quite a few days ago.think its been a week or two already ahhaha. i dreamt i had two clarinet bells.both were leblanc, one with the ring, the other without.so anyway, both cracked, and it was like crack till some wood came off.like termites had just finished with it or something haha.like jaggered and stuff. in the dream i just kept looking at them.just looked at it in amazement. and there was a bright light shining at me all the time.such that when i had the bells in between me and the light source,it was like a man in a desert, placing his hand up to shield his eyes from the sun.and between him and the sun, stand a termite nest.that jaggered flat edge ridge like termite nest design. oh do you know. in the desert, termites build their nest high up into the air?and its just a flat piece liek a straight line when viewed from the top.thats to help them maintain the tempreture. using the sun's rays of cause.so in the day time, it sort of traps the heat in the nest, letting it build up. and in the night, it slowly dissipates. other ants got other ways, like those huge ones in the australian jungles.their queen is quite deep under ground, are they bull ants? cant remember.anyway, to keep the nest cool. the ants travel regularly in and out of the nest.sort of like to carry off some heat with them when they exit.and it actually works because of their numbers. just imagine, when they decide to go on a hunt, its like the forest floor moving.yup, thats how many of them there are.pretty stressed about something i guess. cause my mood ain't that good.getting pretty short tempered. not sure if its stress though. i think i am just thinking too much about certain things.i realise that i no longer wear the smile on my face. instead its a slight frown.i know i worry about something. just hope i can take it easier.hmmm, shall see how. right now, i need a warm bath, and a good night msg, not just from anyone of cause.the little boy falls in love, again.
her terrible boy horribly blogged @ 22:46
